I could not stop laughing at some of these. I could also foresee these things happening in our life.
I put my shirt over my nose when I change a poopy diaper. (If that is what Neal has to do then so be it)
I purposely leave the food that they threw on the floor after they have eaten just in case they need a snack (The dogs will take care of that)
I bribe my girls with chocolate chip mini muffins when we're out, cuz they LOVE them and it keeps them quiet. till we're done with the package. then i'm screwed all over again.
The boys wash their hands before & after meals and after they come in from outside at daycare. Now, at home, they ask for it & I find it a hassle . I will admit, sheepishly, that they know to 'brush their hands off' by rubbing them together...my quick & easy form of 'washing' before dinner ! I do always wash when we come in from outside though.
I left vomit on the floor for 45 minutes while waiting for DH to get home so he could clean it up because I was tired of doing it all by myself. I did give the baby a bath, change his clothes, and mine. And kept everyone safely gated in another room. And I did feel guilty when DH cleaned it up without being asked, and without a complaint. (I think I have actually done this to Neal with a dog accident)
Not only do my kids eat off the floor, I actually feed them like chickens. I put them in their playroom and toss the food in, the love it.
Every morning they wake at 7am, we turn on their tv (yes they have one in their room ) and go back to bed to try and get 30 more minutes.
My biggest fear is getting pregnant again.
Both of my girls can say Sh*t, clear as day, and in the right context
I would trade DH for a housekeeper.
I have a favorite child.
I haven't showered in 3 days and today's not looking good either.
I put peach schnapps in my morning oj pretty much every day between months 2 and 4